


welcome to the rk1700 club :)

by ylgrfjorm



Category: Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: :), Crack, Crack Treated Seriously, Deviant Upgraded Connor | RK900, Fluff and Crack, M/M, Memes, Other, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Possessive Behavior, Protective Upgraded Connor | RK900, Slow To Update, WARNING WARNING: possible thirst, all the good kind of content fellas, calm down connor, everyone has an inner animu in them i'll say that, i don''t know what i was on when i made this, no beta we die like men, oh yeah uhhh, photo memes because ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE, sorry no bromance reed, what else is there to say, why you still reading the tags? G E T A M O V E O N, wow can you can tell i'm a collected being, ┐(￣ヘ￣;)┌
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-11
Updated: 2018-12-11
Packaged: 2019-09-16 01:35:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,133
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16944516
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ylgrfjorm/pseuds/ylgrfjorm
Summary: whyinvitethisasshole: fuck u allbaby: I don’t want to be fucked by Detective Reedbaby: The mere thought corrupts my deviancy-awaitingwrath: this is mega sad, alexa play despactio 2 lmaogoodcopbadcop: Since when the hell was there a Despacito 2 Tinaawaitingwrath: shut the hell up if there’s a despacito 2 there’s a despacito 2





	welcome to the rk1700 club :)

**Author's Note:**

> Heavily inspired by discord and [this texting fic](http://archiveofourown.org/works/15986771) by fornoire
> 
>  
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> ...
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> I have nothing else to say.
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> 
> Other than RK1700 live together in an apartment. Because that's cute.

**_connor_ ** has created the chat:

 

**welcome to the rk1700 club :)**

****

**_connor_ ** _added_ **_nines_ ** _to the chat_ _  
_

**_connor_ ** _has added_ **_hank anderson_ ** _added to the chat_  
  
**_connor_ ** _has added_ **_gavin reed_ ** _to the chat_  
_  
_ **_connor_ ** _has added_ **_tina chen_ **to the chat

 **_connor_ ** _has added_ **_christopher miller_ ** _to the chat_

 

 

 **_connor_ ** _has changed their name to_ **_baby_ ** ****  
** **

**_baby_ ** _has changed_ **_nines_ ** _’s name to_ **_thethiccestmeal_ ** ****  
** **

**_baby_ ** _has changed_ **_hank anderson_ ** _’s name to_ **_madsaddrunklad_ ** ****  
** **

**_thethiccestmeal_ ** _has changed_ **_gavin reed_ ** _’s name to_ **_whyinvitethisasshole_ ** ****  
** **

**_baby_ ** _has changed_ **_tina chen_ ** _’s name to_ **_awaitingwrath_ ** ****  
** **

**_baby_ ** _has changed_ **_christopher miller_ ** _’s name to_ **_goodcopbadcop_ **

****

 

 **baby** : Hello everyone! For those who were invited here, we (Nines and I though mostly me) thought it’d be wonderful to have some type of formal, fun commuting group chat with friends and coworkers!

****

**thethiccestmeal** : Including the ones we have a strong distaste towards.

****

**madsaddrunklad** : yeah seriously **@whyinvitethisasshole**

****

**whyinvitethisasshole** : omg hahaha

****

**whyinvitethisasshole** : VERY FUCKING FUNNY

****

**whyinvitethisasshole** : fuck u **@thethiccestmeal** you pun making plastic prick

****

**whyinvitethisasshole** : probably not even as “thicc” as your damn name says

****

**baby** : G A S P

****

**baby** : I call fucking BULLSHIT 

****

**baby** : Nines can sit on me for days and I’ll live for it

****

**thethiccestmeal** : Connor…

****

**madsaddrunklad** : CONNOR

****

**whyinvitethisasshole** : tits and bits just change my fucking name or i’m leaving this bitch

****

**awaitingwrath** : oh c’mon it /was/ pretty fucking funny

****

**whyinvitethisasshole** : fuck u x2

****

**goodcopbadcop** : Really? Just admit it was funny Gavin because it/is/

****

**whyinvitethisasshole** : fuck u all

****

**baby** : I don’t want to be fucked by Detective Reed

****

**baby** : The mere thought corrupts my deviancy

****

**thethiccestmeal** : I AM THE ONE ONLY WHO WILL FUCK OR BE FUCKED BY CONNOR

****

**baby** : (*´ω｀*)

****

**madsaddrunklad** : holy shit the caps

****

**awaitingwrath** : holy shit the emote

****

**goodcopbadcop** : You’re on something, I’m having concerns

****

**whoinvitedthisasshole** : FINALLY someone said now tell them to change my name chris

****

**goodcopbadcop** : I was talking about you

****

**whoinvitedthisasshole** : W

****

**whoinvitedthisasshole** :

 

 **whoinvitedthisasshole** : listen…

****

**whoinvitedthisasshole** : BITCH WHAT THE F U C K

****

**whoinvitedthisasshole** : THIS IS CYBERBULLYING WHY ARE YOU ENCOURAGING THIS SHIT

****

**whoinvitedthisasshole** : B L O C K E D & R E P O R T E D

****

**awaitingwrath** : didn’t you punch connor in the break room though

****

**thethiccestmeal** : …Oh? How was I not notified about this

****

**baby** : Nines please don’t

****

**thethiccestmeal** : Officer Chen

****

**baby** : Here we go

****

**thethiccestmeal** : Could you perhaps tell me when this event has occurred…

****

**thethiccestmeal** : 

****

**madsaddrunklad** : jesus christ hes even using fucking memes

****

**baby** : That perspective would be on you, Hank

****

**madsaddrunklad** : fuck youre right

****

**whoinvitedthisasshole** : HELLO IS ANYONE hmm idk FORGETTING SOMETHING

****

**awaitingwrath** : only your brain if you even had one

****

**awaitingwrath** : HA suck it loser

****

**goodcopbadcop** : I’m scared how this will go down

****

**madsaddrunklad** :

****  
** **

****

**baby** : This is not what I planned

****

**awatingwrath** : also **@thethiccestmeal** it was when connor was still beep boop doing his mission, in the break room…was there first hand

 

 **whoinvitedthisasshole** : suuuureeeee tina

****

**whoinvitedthisasshole** : suck my big dick barbie doll **@baby**

 

****

**_whoinvitedthisasshole_ ** _has left the chat_ ****  
** **

**_thethiccestmeal_ ** _added_ **_whoinvitedthisasshole_ ** _to the chat_ ****  
** **

**_thethiccestmeal_ ** _changed_ **_whoinvitedthisasshole_ ** _’s name to_ **_trashman69_ **

****

 

 **thethiccestmeal** : Leave the chat and telling connor those words again I’ll make the workplace a fucking living hell just for you.

****

**thethiccestmeal** : It's also unnecessary to spread false facts based off the size of your phallus because let's face it, it's highly likely not as big as one should expect

****

**trashman69** : ……yes sir won’t happen again

****

**thethiccestmeal** : And? Anything else to clear up?

****

**trashman69** : …i have a small penis

****

**thethiccestmeal** : Much better

****

**baby** : Σ（ﾟдﾟlll）

****

**goodcopbadcop** : shot down faster than an android

****

**baby** :

**madsaddrunklad** : TOO SOON CHRIS

****

**thethiccestmeal** : Not unless I shoot them first, and protect who belongs to me

****

**awaitingwrath** : oof fuck that’s hot

****

**baby** : T i n a

****

**baby** : That’s quite straightforward towards…

****

**awaitingwrath** : what? i mean seeing there be a hot (over)protective boyfriend like nines who gets all husky and sultry when mad? sign me tf up but

****

**baby** : My man, as some humans would say, is taken so no thank you

****

**thethiccestmeal** : Do you mean yourself Connor? I’ve taken you in more than one place in the Anderson’s home all those times I came to visit

****

**trashman69** : ASFJLFJKDJKL ARE YOU KIDDING ME ASSHOLE

****

**trashman69** : KEEP THAT SHIT TO YOUR FUCKING SELF FUCK

****

**baby** : NINES!!!!!

****

**madsaddrunklad** : YOU FUCKED IN MY HOUSE?!?!?????!!

****

**goodcopbadcop** : better start cleaning that place good

****

**awaitingwrath** : this is mega sad, alexa play despactio 2 lmao

****

**goodcopbadcop** :

**goodcopbadcop** : Since when the hell was there a Despacito 2 Tina

****

**awaitingwrath** : shut the hell up if there’s a despacito 2 there’s a despacito 2

****

**trashman69** : someone remind me why i’m in this shithole chat again

****

**thethiccestmeal** : Because Connor said so, to which I reluctantly agreed to, as well forced you unfortunately keep company

****

**thethiccestmeal** : Even if I may not completely agree, I’d do anything to please Connor, he’s the reason I…feel what do today

****

**baby** : Nines~

**awaitingwrath** : that's a g i f

 

 **madsaddrunklad** : ugh get a room you horny lil shits

****

**trashman69** : WHO TF CARES LET THEM SUCK EACH OTHERS DICK

****

**trashman69** : notthatidoimnotgaydont@methnx

****

**baby** : Well Detective Reed, I DEFINITELY feel lucky to suck Nines’s dick

****

**baby** : Once I got a taste, I knew I could never go back

****

**baby** : It’s fucking heaven, even if he’s difficult to fit into my mouth sometimes

****

**goodcopbadcop** : TMI THERE PAL

****

**awaitingwrath** : gay robots™

****

**madsadrunklad** : wheres the clorox®

****

**baby** : HANK NO

****

**baby** : Please… ｡ﾟ( ﾟஇ‸இﾟ)ﾟ｡

****

**thethiccestmeal** : Lieutenant, that is not safe for your health…

****

**trashman69** : pfft i can chug a whole gallon and still live

****

**thethiccestmeal** : d o  i t  p u s s y

****

**trashman69** : I WAS KIDDING JESUS

 

 **trashman69** : IF THIS IS THE TREATMENT I GET WHY AM I FORCED TO STAY

 

 **awaitingwrath** : how do you forget why-

****

**goodcopbadcop** : connor and death

****

**awaitingwrath** : ^^

****

**madsaddrunklad** : ^^^^

****

**baby** : ^^^^^^^^

****

**thethiccestmeal** : True, all very true

****

**trashman69** : yeak ok assholes

****

**trashman** : either way shows how much **@thethiccestmeal** personal bitch can’t get enough of me HA

 

****

****_thethiccestmeal_  **** _has changed their name to **death**_

_**death** has changed **trashman69** ’s name to **deadin5** _ ****

****

 

 **deadin5** : wait wtf

****

**baby** : he left the apartment

****

**deadin5** : youre texting in the same room????? whats going on

****

**madsaddrunklad** : ya done fucked up buddy

****

**deadin5** : what???? WHY

****

**deadin5** : JUST TELL ME JESUS FUCK

****

**awaitingwrath** : oh shit just realized

****

**awaitingwrath** : i’ll be busy the day of your funeral soooo see ya

****

**goodcopbadcop** : Me too but tell nines hi

****

**deadin5:** WAIT HOLD UP GUYS GUYS

****

**deadin5** : GIVE ME SOME FUCKING ANSWERS HERE

****

**baby** : Detective Reed, it’d be best to put all defenses in stance for future events

****

**baby** : Most importantly the doors and windows

****

**deadin5** : DON’T TELL ME WHAT TO DO YOU CANNED TWINK

****

**baby** : ………

****

**baby** : …Gavin

****

**deadin5** : ……what

****

**baby** : You do realize Nines can easily enter the database to search where you live, correct?

 

****

**_death_ ** _has changed_ **_deadin5_** _’s name to_ **_dead_ **

****

 

 **dead** : shit

 

**private chat**

**—**

**rkock900** & **givemecoffeedipsit**

****

**rkock900** :

dpd, open your fucking door

 

**Author's Note:**

> I'd treat Gavin with iHop then fight him.


End file.
